In 2016, I am planning on having some guest bloggers write for my blog page. So to kick off the guest bloggers, I ask my 12-year-old daughter Laura, to blog on the topic – From her perspective, What makes a good dad?
Here is her contribution.
5 Things That Make a Good Dad
1) A Dad that makes time for you.
I understand that many Dads are very busy, my Dad’s very busy too, however he always tells us we are more important than his job and that we are his number one priority. So if we need to tell him something it’s ok to text him or if he’s at his office at home, talk to him. I understand if you’re really unable to, but when you’re not working make sure you spend time with your kids.
It might sound a bit strange for me to say that I need to be complimented and when kids are older they might say ‘you’re only saying that because you’re my Dad’ but it DOES help! Plus it builds our self-esteem, which is important.
Then there is encouragement which is just as important, I’m not very good at sports so when I would come last in a race, Dad would say ‘you beat all the spectators and people who could’ve done it and didn’t.’ Thinking about it now I never said thank you for saying it (as I was probably grumpy about how I lost) and probably said ‘that’s what a loser would say’ but it was really important he said that.
Also Dad would use that to get me to do things I wasn’t sure about, like swimming carnivals (I don’t remember exactly but probably went like this.)
Me- Can I have the day off tomorrow because it’s the swimming carnival and I’m not good at sports, so I may as well not go.
Dad- No, even if you lose you will still beat the people who could’ve entered but didn’t:- you will do great.
Then I went on and ended up doing it and came second in a breast-stroke, which I had only done three times in my friend’s pool. Now I am not saying that, saying that will make your child win, but from your encouragement it will make your child do things they wouldn’t think of doing and actually might enjoy! After my success at the swimming carnival, I tried entering more things at athletics carnivals and got more ribbons:- but without Dad I just would have had a lot of days off school.
3) A Dad that tells you it’s going to be alright
Story time again! So for my birthday one year Dad got me a twenty dollar iTunes card and he did it wrong and entered his credit card details in to my iTunes account. (Don’t ask how.) Anyway this wasn’t my first time using iTunes cards (not knowing Dad did it wrong). When I went to spend the money I was waiting for the insufficient funds sign to come up at some point: instead of checking how much money I had. At the time I was obsessed with this dragon game (Dragon Vale) where you could do in app purchases:- FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS LATER Dad worked out where his money was going and told me about it….. (Dad note: it was $541 but who is keeping track)
I felt really bad and told him I would pay him back with my pocket money (at the time I got five dollars a week). He told me it’s ok and not to feel bad and to take it as a life lesson. I have never forgotten how gracious and calm he was about it. At the time when he first told me I thought every thing was going to collapse and we would all die! But he reminded me worse things could happen, it’s not the end of the world and he could fix it. Now I know when I’m older and make mistakes everything’s going to be ok and be calm and remember it’s not the end of the world like what my Dad did for me. That’s not the only situation that’s happened just last week there were phone bill issues and when I was upset Dad made me feel better which is what I needed, but anyway story times over
4) A Dad that treats his wife (your mum) well
From a daughter’s point of view when a Dad treats the Mum well it shows you how guys should treat you when your older. If your Dad doesn’t treat your Mum well then the daughter will think its ok and her future boyfriend/fiancée/husband might not treat her well either. From a son’s point of view (not that I’m a boy) I think it would make him think its ok to be rude or not look after his girlfriend/fiancée/wife.
5) A Dad that listens to your stories
I talk A LOT and I mean A LOT, A LOT and when Dad is interested and talks back and listens, I find it fun and makes me want to be around him when he can have an interesting conversation with me and knows what I like.
I have never had this happen to me but I see it happen a lot where parents will be listening to a child tell a story and at the end all the parents say is ‘you talk too much’. Then I feel bad when I talk to the parents and the child kind acts like nothing happens but I know that something happened.
Laura Pilt (12 yrs old)
Hey thanks for your blog. Love your wisdom.
If you got something out of this blog, then here are a couple of other related to parenting and children
- Things that I have learnt over the last 14 years over being a dad.
- Spending more time with the family.
- 44 Pieces of Advice on life I gave Lakeisha on her 16th Birthday.
- Is it really disempowering for me to call my daughters Princesses?
Ps Peter Pilt
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