Imagine if the Christmas Story happened in 2021.

Earlier this year, an unvaccinated Jewish teenage TikToker @Marythevirgin, announced on her socials that she was having a baby, refusing to say who the father was, but also claiming it wasn’t her boyfriend.

Due to the Omicron outbreak across Israel, the Chief Medical Officer declared in early December, that a national census was being taken and every person has to return to their home of origin.

Controversially, Mary the Virgin and her now hubby, were forced to travel to the West Bank to the town of Bethlehem. Because of her unvaxed status, she was unable to fly and so her only option was to hire a donkey and ride to Bethlehem. When her and hubby @thelittledrummerboy, arrived, all the motels were booked for Christmas celebrations, except the Bethlehem Hilton, which was too expensive, so they were offered a barn, where ultimately, Mary the Virgin gave birth to a baby boy. She was considering naming him Hamish but settled on the Jewish version of the English name Joshua or for the Mexican readers, the Spanish version of Hosea.

Nomadic sheep farmers in the hills surrounding Bethlehem, all tripled vaxed and booked in for their world leading fourth jab, have claimed that people appeared to them singing Christmas Carols in the sky and telling them about the birth of the baby. Anti vaxers are claiming that if you are triple jabbed it causes you to see apparitions.

None the less, the Mask wearing famers went and visited the baby.

NASA have released details of a new slow moving comet that has been discovered during the last few weeks. They are calling the comet, The Wise Guys Comet after the astrologers from Iraq who made the discovery. Elon Musk has applied for an injunction on the name claiming, he saw the comment first hand, when he was in space in November. Trump is actually claiming he put the comet there and that it was only hidden because of Russian interference. He wants the comet to be named Don Com.

Ultimately the Wise Guys aka known as the Three Wise Men have been outed by a Cancel Culture group who have described the group as sexist, elitist and misogynistic for only having males in the group.

On their journey to see the new baby, they stopped into see the Prime Minister of Isael, Naftali Bennett, saying they were in the country to visit the new King of the Jews. This news deeply troubled the PM and his cabinet, not only because Israel is a democracy, but because a delegation from Iraq was declaring a baby born on the West Bank as the new King of the nation. PM Bennett has requested an urgent sitting of the UN Security Council. He has tightened checkpoints to and from the West Bank. A traditional ally of Israel, America, has issued a statement saying they would like to issue a statement but President Biden was having a nap at the time. Again controversially, in a move that has angered Israel.

Egypt has said they will welcome the new King of the Jews and he can live there for a few years. This has also angered traditional muslim nations saying they also want a baby born to be their king.

@marythevirgin has released a statement on Twitter, saying that there is no need to fight over the baby, and that he is not only the King of the Jews but a King for all humanity.

Merry Christmas.

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